Thursday, September 20, 2012
My Mother
My Dear Reader, in my last post I shared that mother was coming to the end of her long illness, and I am sad to say that she passed away at home in Connecticut around 9 am on Labor Day. I was with her for her last breath for which I am grateful, though it is not an easy thing to experience. A friend of mine said, "You accompanied her to the other side. You did some heavy lifting." Which is an accurate statement as I have been exhausted since then. Several years ago my mother was diagnosed with pulmonary fibrosis, a incurable disease of the lungs. For the last sixteen months, she has been pretty much confined to her bed where she was beautifully and lovingly cared for by my father. It was my wish to go with mother and my father too through this experience and help them as I could.
We had a memorial service, or Life Celebration as she wanted it to be called, this past Saturday at the Guilford Funeral Home. My mother was a spiritual person and talked a lot about what she wanted at the event which included a profusion of lush flowers in pink, purple and red, her ashes in an urn with fairies coming out the top of it, and overhead a festive chuppa, the kind of structure found at a Jewish wedding. We - my father, three siblings and in-laws - pulled it all off, and it was standing-room-only for my mother at the Guilford Funeral Home for her moving and beautiful service.
TD designed the wonderful program filled with my mother's favorite quotes and photos –
Working on that service and going through with it was the hardest thing I have done in my life so far. Every action felt like a Herculean task - every action, another good-bye. If you have lost a loved one perhaps you know how I felt. My family was so very grateful for everyone who was there with us in person and in spirit. I spoke at the service and talked about how much my mother influenced me growing up as she shared all of her interests with me – fashion, decorating, style and art. And speaking of that, she loved this blog. She was its biggest fan, sending me a quick email and telling how she liked practically every single post, which now number over 400. How I will miss my fan.
My mother holding me when I was six months old –
My mother and father at a wedding before they were married –
Later, in the 60s, at a cocktail party –
More recently –
Through her long illness, my mother had a wonderfully positive attitude. I never heard her once complain or whine about her condition. She had no regrets or resentments, and she was not afraid of death. She was an inspiration to all who visited her, and a fantastic role model for the final phase of life. When I visited, she kept me busy. She wanted everything to be in order when she left and so we went through a lot of possessions and papers, discarding things as we went. "I can't take that with me to fairyland," she would say with a shrug.
On summer vacation in the Adirondacks –
A wee child in the woods –
A fairy in fairyland –
Tuesday, August 28, 2012
A Weekend on Fire Island
A view of the harbor in Fire Island Pines from the Top of the Bay shop. (click on photos to enlarge)
TD and I had a wonderful summer weekend on Fire Island, courtesy of our friends David and Gary who invited us to their handsome and comfortable home. It was lovely to spend time with them and also to be on Fire Island again. Fire Island Pines is a beautiful spot where we have had many great times over the years. Four years ago, this blog was born in the Pines. And, most importantly, TD and I met there over Labor Day weekend...wait for it...27 years ago. Our anniversary is coming up. And so Fire Island Pines has a special place in our hearts.
On the ferry boat ride from Sayville to the Pines, this traveler was carrying a chic purple J. Anthony weekend bag which is instantly recognizable by its simple lines, timeless design, and leather placket for monogramming.
Note to self: look into a T. Anthony bag.
At David and Gary's house, we enjoyed their gracious and easy-going hospitality which included some fantastic meals prepared on the grill. David had the butcher butterfly an organic chicken, which he then marinaded and grilled – I think it was the best chicken I ever had.
The pool at their house is long and wide and encircled by a deck – perfect for hanging out in the water or at its edge.
Wispy clouds floated by overhead
while a butterfly enjoyed the nectar of the latana in the nearby flower box – do you see him in the center?
There are little shops to visit in the Pines like Top of the Bay where I took this picture overlooking the harbor below.
Down at the beach, the sound of the waves and the ever-changing ocean are so soothing.
The weather was spectacular – we lucked out with sunny, hot, crystal clear days.
On the beach there is a never-ending parade of strollers
swimmers
and volley ball players.
The light at the end of August takes on a silvery hue so everything shimmers late in the day. It really is heaven on earth where one tries to linger a little longer.
At the end of the weekend we were back on the ferry headed to the main land and "the real world" as fashion designer Peter Som said to me en route.
Many thanks to our hosts David and Gary for a beautiful, relaxing weekend. It was a relief for me from a sadness – my mother was diagnosed a few years ago with pulmonary fibrosis, a disease of the lungs which has no cure, and which is getting progressively worse for her. Please keep her in your thoughts and prayers, dear reader – my mother was been the biggest supporter of this blog and was the first to instill in me a love for beautiful things.
Wednesday, August 8, 2012
About Face: Supermodels Then and Now, on HBO

A group shot of the original supermodels -- photographs are by Timothy Greenfield-Sanders and from HBO.
I recently enjoyed watching on HBO a documentary called About Face by photographer Timothy Greenfield-Sanders in which he interviews top models from the '70's and early '80's – the first supermodels. In fact, I plan to see it again, as HBO is running it through August. Greenfield-Sanders gathers up a stellar group to talk to including Christie Brinkley, Cheryl Tiegs, Jerry Hall, Karen Bjornson, Lisa Taylor, Beverly Johnson and Kim Alexis. I remember a lot of these women on the cover of Vogue when I was growing up. They perfectly captured the energy and beauty of American fashion and style which was exploding at the time with the likes of Calvin Klein, Ralph Lauren and Bill Blass. The documentary offers a fascinating look into modeling and the world of fashion, and for me, who has a tender spot for that era, it was kind of like seeing old friends again.
Naturally, given the stature of these women, a subject of the documentary is aging and how growing older is perceived in the fashion and beauty business. The women have differing opinions about plastic surgery and medical efforts to look young.
The elegant and striking Carmen Dell'Orefice, now age 81, is all for it.


"I think it's bad we have as role models people who are scary to small children," she says. (Hello, Joan Rivers!) "Why shouldn't we be allowed to age and why shouldn't we be respected for it?" she drawls in her wonderful Texan accent.
My favorite model to see again was Lisa Taylor who was in two iconic fashion photographs from that era. I took pictures of them both ata 2009 exhibit about models at the Metropolitan Museum of Art . Vogue fashion editor Polly Mellen worked on both of these shoots and I talked to her about these pictures when I interviewed her.
One by Helmut Newton shows Taylor wearing Calvin Klein and provocatively watching a man walk by,

and the other is by Arthur Elgort, and pictures Taylor, again in Calvin Klein, driving over the George Washington bridge.

Naturally, given the stature of these women, a subject of the documentary is aging and how growing older is perceived in the fashion and beauty business. The women have differing opinions about plastic surgery and medical efforts to look young.
The elegant and striking Carmen Dell'Orefice, now age 81, is all for it.

"If you had the ceiling falling down in your living room," she asks, "would you not go and have a repair?"
Paulina Porizkova, who was born in Czechoslovakia and is married to Ric Ozak, the lead singer from the band The Cars, disagrees, "To me the most beautiful thing there is in another human being is confidence, and nothing says 'I'm not confident' as much as Botox."
The glorious Jerry Hall, who is the daughter of a truck driver from Gonzalez, Texas, and had four children with Mick Jagger, also demurs.
Paulina Porizkova, who was born in Czechoslovakia and is married to Ric Ozak, the lead singer from the band The Cars, disagrees, "To me the most beautiful thing there is in another human being is confidence, and nothing says 'I'm not confident' as much as Botox."
The glorious Jerry Hall, who is the daughter of a truck driver from Gonzalez, Texas, and had four children with Mick Jagger, also demurs.

"I think it's bad we have as role models people who are scary to small children," she says. (Hello, Joan Rivers!) "Why shouldn't we be allowed to age and why shouldn't we be respected for it?" she drawls in her wonderful Texan accent.
"It was about more than selling clothes and making money. It was about creating a beautiful world that you entered into." Jerry Hall
My favorite model to see again was Lisa Taylor who was in two iconic fashion photographs from that era. I took pictures of them both at
One by Helmut Newton shows Taylor wearing Calvin Klein and provocatively watching a man walk by,
and the other is by Arthur Elgort, and pictures Taylor, again in Calvin Klein, driving over the George Washington bridge.
Lisa Taylor was the epitome of a carefree American beauty which always looked perfect but effortless at the same time. Taylor now lives in California, and admits to the great doubts she had working as a model. "I really didn't think I could do anything," she says. She also talks about using drugs which were rife in the business and took their toll on her peers including Gia Carangi. "I'm really glad I didn't die in the process," Taylor states.
"For me it was about the picture. I felt I could communicate. How do you translate your experiences good and bad into something that's meaningful to yourself and to others." Dayle Haddon
These women are a part of the evolution of American fashion, and the story continues. Cheryl Tiegs, who was famous for her Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue covers, remembers some valuable advice: "My agent said to me - the key to beauty is to always be educating yourself, always learning something new and to have something to talk about. I never forgot that and I think that's how one ages beautifully."
Blog bonus, not one but two trailers:
Blog bonus, not one but two trailers:
Monday, July 23, 2012
A Trip to Martha's Vineyard
Up at Aquinnah, a view to the Gay Head Lighthouse (click on photos to enlarge)
Last week TD and I had a lovely and much-needed week's vacation on Martha's Vineyard. The island off the coast of Massachusetts has a special spot in my heart because I lived for two formative summers there in college, and the place had a big influence on me. Martha's Vineyard to me is a combination of sophistication plus natural, easy style that continues to inspire me. We have been back a handful of times since, and I always love to be there.
My mother painted this view of me walking to the beach during a family vacation -

For this trip, I found on the internet a cottage which is located way up-island in Aquinnah. When I lived on Martha's Vineyard, the area was called Gay Head, but it has since reverted back to its original Native American name. Our little cottage was at the end of a long dirt road, and it was one mile from the ocean beach.
We went straight away to get a car beach pass to Philbin Beach, the private beach for Aquinnah residents. To get to the beach, you walk up a sandy path hill, over a crest, and then down a hill for the most wonderful entrance to a beach.

We walked up towards the Gay Head Cliffs which are renowned for their red clay content which was used to make bricks.

Around every turn in the bend is another great view.

Other beachgoers too were enjoying the beauty of the beach and ocean.

We took another path up, over kind of a wooden boardwalk that weaves through grassy fields.

Our little cottage was a wonderful combination of wood beams, blue trim and white furnishings - perfectly casual for the beach.

There was an airy porch, for writing and drawing.

The house was completely secluded and the only sound we heard was birds singing.

On the second floor was a large bedroom with windows on three sides. In the middle of one night a thunderstorm rolled in and bright lightening cracked all around us through the windows.
We went to the nearby fishing village of Menemsha where we met our New York City friends Beth and Tim for a lobster dinner at the Home Port restaurant. Nothing better than lobster right out of the sea.

Martha's Vineyard is largely undeveloped so a great part of its natural beauty is green country land that rolls down to the blue ocean. In spots, grey weathered wood houses with white painted trim dot the landscape. I love the colors of Martha's Vineyard – blue, green, sand, grey, white. That is really all I wear.

One day at the beach, we situated ourselves near a large rock. I thought that rock looked familiar.

It's where we took a family photo, probably twenty five years ago, with my parents and siblings. Yours truly with the long hair is on the right. It is one of our best family pictures.

I walked along the beach and saw these rocks which were rather miraculously balanced.

When I returned, they were gone. Did I make that up in my head, I thought? No, because I have the photo as proof!
I was waiting for TD to do some body surfing in the ocean, but I like the sound of the waves anyway –
We drove to a private beach on Menemsha Pond and had a glass of white wine as we watched the sun set. Birds fluttered about overhead as the sun sank down. The ever-changing colors were breathtaking. I said, "This is like we're in a Walt Disney movie."

On our last day there we went up to the Gay Head Lighthouse to take in the ocean views.

Below the Lighthouse parking lot, a big white tent had been set up on the side of a hill with white heraldic flags waving overhead. It looked like a tent for a wedding. Sure enough, as we passed by, I saw the bride who was there with a photographer. She was tan and had blond hair, and was wearing a white strapless wedding dress with a big bouffant skirt. Following the photographer, she gathered up her voluminous skirt in her arms and ran down the green hill out of sight.

For this trip, I found on the internet a cottage which is located way up-island in Aquinnah. When I lived on Martha's Vineyard, the area was called Gay Head, but it has since reverted back to its original Native American name. Our little cottage was at the end of a long dirt road, and it was one mile from the ocean beach.
We went straight away to get a car beach pass to Philbin Beach, the private beach for Aquinnah residents. To get to the beach, you walk up a sandy path hill, over a crest, and then down a hill for the most wonderful entrance to a beach.
We walked up towards the Gay Head Cliffs which are renowned for their red clay content which was used to make bricks.
Around every turn in the bend is another great view.
Other beachgoers too were enjoying the beauty of the beach and ocean.
We took another path up, over kind of a wooden boardwalk that weaves through grassy fields.
Our little cottage was a wonderful combination of wood beams, blue trim and white furnishings - perfectly casual for the beach.
There was an airy porch, for writing and drawing.
The house was completely secluded and the only sound we heard was birds singing.
On the second floor was a large bedroom with windows on three sides. In the middle of one night a thunderstorm rolled in and bright lightening cracked all around us through the windows.
We went to the nearby fishing village of Menemsha where we met our New York City friends Beth and Tim for a lobster dinner at the Home Port restaurant. Nothing better than lobster right out of the sea.
Martha's Vineyard is largely undeveloped so a great part of its natural beauty is green country land that rolls down to the blue ocean. In spots, grey weathered wood houses with white painted trim dot the landscape. I love the colors of Martha's Vineyard – blue, green, sand, grey, white. That is really all I wear.
One day at the beach, we situated ourselves near a large rock. I thought that rock looked familiar.
It's where we took a family photo, probably twenty five years ago, with my parents and siblings. Yours truly with the long hair is on the right. It is one of our best family pictures.

I walked along the beach and saw these rocks which were rather miraculously balanced.
When I returned, they were gone. Did I make that up in my head, I thought? No, because I have the photo as proof!
I was waiting for TD to do some body surfing in the ocean, but I like the sound of the waves anyway –
We drove to a private beach on Menemsha Pond and had a glass of white wine as we watched the sun set. Birds fluttered about overhead as the sun sank down. The ever-changing colors were breathtaking. I said, "This is like we're in a Walt Disney movie."
On our last day there we went up to the Gay Head Lighthouse to take in the ocean views.
Below the Lighthouse parking lot, a big white tent had been set up on the side of a hill with white heraldic flags waving overhead. It looked like a tent for a wedding. Sure enough, as we passed by, I saw the bride who was there with a photographer. She was tan and had blond hair, and was wearing a white strapless wedding dress with a big bouffant skirt. Following the photographer, she gathered up her voluminous skirt in her arms and ran down the green hill out of sight.
Thursday, July 5, 2012
Go to the Metropolitan Museum of Art!
The facade of the Branch Bank of America from 1822-24, originally located on Wall Street, and now found in the newly renovated American wing at the Metropolitan Museum.
Since the Fourth of July fell in the middle of the week, TD and I were in town for the holiday and we decided to take advantage of the day and go up to the Metropolitan Museum of Art. We did our best to get there on the early side, before it got very crowded, arriving at 11 am.
The first stop was Schiaparelli and Prada: Impossible Conversations, the current exhibition at the Costume Institute. It opened in May and you might have read about it; it pairs together in conversation and clothes Elsa Schiaparelli, the Italian surrealist fashion designer who lived from 1890 - 1973, and Miuccia Prada, the Italian fashion designer who is of course alive and thriving. Cleverly, the curators of the show created video clips directed by Baz Luhrmann (Moulin Rouge!, Australia) in which Prada and Schiaparelli, played by actress Judy Davis, have compelling conversations.

The show was just so smart, and it was so interesting to hear the fashion designers talk about their work and see their clothes presented together. And the clothes are beautiful. Carefully constructed and decorated with embroidery, beads, paillettes, and plastic disks, the designs are intricate, striking, and timeless.
They discuss their different approaches to fashion – Prada designs from the waist down and Schaparelli designed from the waist up, noting that she lived in a cafe society where women sat at restaurant tables so it was important to look fashionable on top, with an emphasis on the shoulders and the bust.
Prada on the other hand notes that "there is so much going on from the waist down, sexy stuff, being attached to the earth." In fact, I have noticed in photos that she often wears a plain sweater and a crazy skirt, like one made of feathers, and outrageous shoes. In this movie, in fact Prada, perhaps the most influential fashion designer in the world, sits at a table wearing a simple white shirt with a grey v-neck sweater, small earrings and no makeup.
This is a photo of Jenna Lyons, the creative director at J. Crew, with designer Eddie Borgo, arriving at the opening party of this exhibition, and you can see that she is channeling the same idea with a plain v-neck sweater and a fantastic, opulent feather skirt. And a great red lipstick.

It's such a cool way to dress – understated on top and glamorous on bottom, a great combination.
Elsewhere in the show, Prada said (and I was trying to write down the quotes correctly), "With my clothes, I try to make men look human. I try to make women look powerful."
"I don't want to make women look pleasing in any way."
"I am trying to create something to wear that makes sense with the mess of life."
Go see this show – it's a very intelligent presentation of clothes and the ideas behind them.
After the dazzle of ornate decoration, we went to see the exhibition of plant drawings by Ellsworth Kelly, which was like a clean, cold, bracing drink of water.
Sunflower, from 1957
Ellsworth Kelly, the contemporary painter who is renowned for his minimalist, color-field paintings, lives in upstate New York, where he produces delicate plant drawings that are lovely in their simplicity. It's a wonderful show to see in the summertime.
The Ellsworth Kelly Plant Drawings catalogue
Then we headed up to the hot, sunny rooftop to see Cloud City, a large constellation sculpture of interconnected modules by Argentinean artist Tomas Saraceno.
Made out of metal and transparent and reflective materials, it looked like a shiny space ship had landed on the roof of the Met. It's possible to climb up into it, but visitors need to go first to the fourth floor to get a timed ticket (free).

After a lunch in the cafeteria, we headed to the recently renovated American Wing (pictured at the top of this post) which I had previously visited with Jane. Here, the museum's American paintings have been beautifully mounted in airy new galleries; I think my favorite room holds the John Singer Sargents. It was a hot summer day, but the whole museum was cooly air-conditioned. The spacious, serene museum is for me like going to church, and there is a lot to see there right now. It's like being in heaven.
After a lunch in the cafeteria, we headed to the recently renovated American Wing (pictured at the top of this post) which I had previously visited with Jane. Here, the museum's American paintings have been beautifully mounted in airy new galleries; I think my favorite room holds the John Singer Sargents. It was a hot summer day, but the whole museum was cooly air-conditioned. The spacious, serene museum is for me like going to church, and there is a lot to see there right now. It's like being in heaven.
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